In my parent coaching practice, I’m often asked, “How can I cope with – or turn around – my picky eater?”

The answer varies depending on the child and family, of course, but a few general principles apply to all kids and families. It’s important to understand that  kids are picky eaters for a variety of reasons, least of which is just to be difficult.

Why Kids Don’t Beg for Brussel Sprouts:

1. they are biologically wired to resist bitter flavors and seek out sweet flavors
2. they may have limited exposure to a variety of tastes, textures, colors
3. they may not have healthy eating models
4. they may have sensory problems such as hypersensitivity to smells and tastes or “oral defensiveness” (Sometimes the child might require professional intervention with an occupational therapist for support.)

Usually these issues can be addressed simply by broadening the child’s food experiences. As trying and demoralizing as it can be, continue to offer multiple healthful choices, so that your child can pick and choose. Even if it’s been refused before, continue to offer it with confidence.

Tips to Encourage Healthy Eating:

• Expose your child to previously rejected food over and over again. It takes 15 exposures before children acquire specific tastes.
• Model a healthy relationship with food. Oooh and ahhh over vegetables the same way you might a slice of cake or scoop of ice cream.
• Talk about eating all of the colors of the rainbow. Encourage adventurous eating. Have your child choose a new fruit or vegetable at the store or farmer’s market to try.
• Prepare healthful snacks (fresh fruit and veggies) so they are easily accessible. Make these available when kids are their hungriest (just before a meal).
• Encourage and give positive reinforcement for adventurous, healthy eating.
• Teach about the importance of good nutrition (Think about reasons that matter to kids – grow tall, have strong bones and muscles, run fast)
• Give your child some control. Let him help with shopping or cooking or planning a meal and allow him to choose 1 of 2 new foods to try at a meal.
• Growing Food. Call healthy food, “growing food”. Kids value growing much more than being healthy.

Some kids will always eat anything. Some kids will become more adventurous with more exposure. Some kids will ebb and flow with their preferences. Like so many things parenting, it’s all in the presentation. If there is a negative charge in the food dynamic, take a step back and stop pushing. And by all means, DO NOT label your child as a picky eater. Once you do, you will have a picky eater. And a power struggle.

Easy tip: While I cook dinner, my kids each chomp on a whole, peeled carrot. They love these and I can feel good about it too. It eliminates (or minimizes) that end of the day grouchiness. Hunger and exhaustion are often the culprits, and a healthy snacks tends to eliminate as much of that grouchiness as possible.

Healthy Family Cookbooks:

Deceptively Delicious, by Jessica Seinfeld (Jerry’s wife). This is a great cookbook for those wanting to conceal the vegetables. I find it particularly useful for getting veggies into baked goods.

Organic Baby & Toddler Cookbook, by Lizzie Vann. This book is full of easy, tasty everyday recipes.

Feeding the Whole Family, by Cynthia Lair. A book filled with flavor-FULL meal ideas using only whole foods. It’s a great start for introducing lots of different flavors to your wee ones that you’ll enjoy too.