This post is a continuation of the conversation we started last week. If you missed the first part, where I addressed the biggest contributor to the morning struggle, please read it here.
For most, it’s the morning to-do list that creates the power struggle and frustration, but for some kids it’s simply hard to wake up and get going. For others, saying goodbye is a long dreaded event.
Waking up: If your child is struggling to wake up in the morning, consider an earlier bedtime. You can alleviate any hesitations around this by reminding yourself that most kids do not get enough sleep and it is negatively impacting their overall performance. In addition, you can employ a strategy that has great success for adults: an alarm clock. Choose either a sunrise alarm clock (light that gradually gets brighter to mimic the sunrise) or a regular alarm set quietly to music.
Saying goodbye: If saying goodbye is the challenging time for your child, then talk about it at a time when you know he will be relaxed and receptive. Don’t initiate this conversation in the midst of a situation when you are trying to leave. Save it for the family meeting.
In the meeting you can clarify your needs or expectations and explain why they are important to you. Your child will appreciate hearing some details about your day. This information might help him accept why you need to leave. “I need to drive to work so that I can write on the computer” (fill in the blank).
A conversation about this should always be a two-way street. Find out what part of leaving makes him sad. Ask how you can help him not feel sad. Create a secret handshake or other way to say goodbye that feels special and authentic. The Kissing Hand is a great book for talking about this with kids.
In general, it is always advantageous to prepare your child. Preparing him for the day might include saying, “When I drop you off at daycare, I’ll take off your jacket and then give you a big hug. I’ll need to leave quickly so that I can go to work. I’ll be thinking about you all morning and will see you after lunch. Then we can read a book together.”
If your child struggles in the morning or you are having a hard time getting out the door with your nerves intact, shoot me an email and let’s brainstorm solutions.
Definitely advice all parents can use – thanks for sharing! I shared the first installment on our blog’s web roundup last week and will post a link to this one as well.
Fantastic! Thank you. I just checked out your school’s blog. I think a blog is a wonderful tool for a school. It must improve parent communication, education, and sense of community.